Lost In Space

Lost In Space

While in the military I was part of the Naval Security Group. My second tour I was stationed at the Naval Security Group Headquarters (NSGH).  My supervisor, CTM2 Jack N., was a dyed in the wool nut. How he got his clearance, and kept it, I will never know.  We worked a modified swing shift, two 12 hour days. 24 hours off, then two 12 hour nights, followed by 96 hours off. The shifts were seven to seven. Whenever the weather permitted, Jack rode his Harley to work.

We completed our first shift and left at 7 pm. The next day Jack did not show up or call in. The following night Jack still did not appear. By now I was getting worried, so I called his house. His wife had not seen him. The next night was the same. When we returned from our four day break Jack came riding in on his Harley, with a shaved head. This was 1985 and shaved heads on white men had not become popular.

I wanted to find out what happened, but before I could talk to him, our chief called Jack into his office. I could here the chief yelling “Where the hell have you been?” (He didn’t say hell, but I don’t want to offend anyone.) Jack replied “You won’t believe me if I tell you.”

The chief says “If you don’t tell me, I will have to write you up, and you will probably be busted.” (Busted was reduced in rank, was usually accompanied be a fine, and gets very expensive, quickly.)

There was a pause then Jack goes “OK, but like I said, you won’t believe it. Last week I was riding my bike home, and about half way there, my bike just stopped and a bright light surrounded me. I heard a humming, then nothing. The next thing I remember, was this morning, I was on my bike heading into work. I have no memory of the last week, my head was shaved, and I feel like I was violated. I was picked up by a UFO!”

I was trying not to laugh out loud, and give away that I could here everything, when I heard the chief spluttering, He cussed, he cajoled, he threatened, but Jack would not budge on his story.

Jack was one of those people who could fall in a pile of manure and come out smelling like a rose. He didn’t change his story and nothing happened. A year later, Jack and I had become good friends. I asked him “Last year when you went UA for a week, what really happened, anyway?”

He looked me straight in the eye and said “I was picked up by a UFO. That’s what I told the Chief, that’s what I told the Captain, and that’s what I told my wife. That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it!” That was classic Jack.